movie reviews: February 2008 Archives

Movie Review: Rock 'n' Roll Nightmare

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I was recently alerted to the existence of a man called Jon Mikl Thor, who is (all at once) a bodybuilder, rock legend, filmmaker, stunt man, van enthusiast, and Viking poser.  He made a film in the 1970s that was a fictional account of his band AND a horror flick, all at once.  The "plot" goes something like so:

  • The band goes to a farmhouse in the remote countryside of Canada to record their sophomore album and rehearse for their upcoming tour.

  • The number of people staying at the farmhouse is conveniently an even number, with an equal number of boys and girls.  It follows that every person is matched with another person and has a sex scene.  Thor's is in the shower with a redhead and a very cheap, very low-pressured shower head.

  • One by one, band members and girlfriends start to disappear and/or be murdered.  No one is terribly concerned by this.

  • The culprit seems to be these little cute muppet wads of flesh.  Each has a tuft of hair, one eyeball, and two fingers on each hand.  These are apparently shapeshifters, because sometimes they take the shape of the people staying in the house.  Or starfish.  And then kill.

  • Then suddenly...Thor's hair is teased up to epic proportions and his redhead girlfriend turns into Satan and they have a battle in the barn.  I recommend you forward to the 5:20 mark, where Satan starts to fling starfish at Thor, and they "stick" to Thor in form of him "catching" them and holding them to his body:




  • Thor wins the battle, and suddenly the movie ends with a tightly cropped shot of a house, and then pulls away, then fades out.  It definitely gave a sense of closure except for the fact that...that was the first time that particular house was shown in the movie.
Before finding success as a heavy metal superstar, Jon Mikl Thor used to be a strongman whose favorite trick was blowing up hot water bottles until they popped.  Why he didn't do THAT to battle Satan, I'll never understand.

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This page is a archive of entries in the movie reviews category from February 2008.

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