quotes: September 2007 Archives

At the bar last night, I got into a "who has a more retarded text message in their phone history?" battle with Jeremy.  My best entry was from the one I sent to Micah after Colleen gave us our MeanBags™.  It said:

"Dear fuckstick,
Hope you're enjoying your new douchebag as much as I'm enjoying mine!
love,
dicktard"

Then this turned into a whole conversation about the usefulness of the word "douche," its increased use in our respective vocabularies, and the awesomeness of the variation "douchedragon."  To prove that I had been using the word "douche" a lot (perhaps even over-using it), I mentioned how when I type in the letter D on a text message, my predictive text brings up "douchebag" as one of the first suggested words.  When I typed it in my phone to demonstrate, all the oft-used D words actually made up a sentence.  A relatively amazing sentence:

"Do, don't down doing down...will do-me Dollywood douchebag."

Ack!  Which I just realized could be a really great twist on the Andy Milonakis song "Me No Like Hollywood Douchebags!"  Filming on location at Dollywood will begin next summer!

In unpacking, I came across a couple of surprises I left for myself when I left Dallas.  Two sticky-notes.  Sticky-note quotes, the best kind of sticky-notes.

So at my going away party about a month ago, I set up all these little storefronts for all the various crap I was trying to get rid of.  In the Bed Bath and Beyond section, one of the items I was trying to give away was a classic wooden rolling pin I got from my mom, and it had a ribbed cotton protective sleevie thingie.  George saw it, and asked:

The second note is slightly more mysterious, because I only caught the tail end of whatever Micah was talking about.  Your guess is as good as mine...